Jump to content

WHAT'S THE ABSOLUTE WORST SCIENCE FICTION FILM EVER?


papasmurf

Recommended Posts

As I just responded to Noel's post on "What film really dissapointed", I got this idea. It's really his, I just "went with it"! It was posted in the "What's your favorite SF film of all time?" thread, but this deserves it's own! There are as many truly "bad SF films" as good ones, probably more.

 

"Plan 9 from Outer Space" was voted the "All time worst SF film ever" some time ago, but I can think of a heck of a lot of "stinkers"!

 

This should be fun, as we have a multitude of 100%, truly God-awful choices, to ponder!

 

Let's start this off right....Mmmm...let's see...truly awful...stinky...just plain horrid....dry.gif

 

So many choices, first ones that come to mind are the endless sequels to "Planet of the Apes", all 433 of them!

 

First one was good, second one, not bad, after that, it's just awfuuuuulll...:smiley11:

 

"Solar Babies"....OH MY God!! Roller skating kids, in an oppressive future society!!! Please, the barf bag to your right....quickly.....:smiley30:

 

C'mon, you got a few, this has mega-potential to run endlessly!

 

Participate, or I'll send an elite commando squad of Smurfs to your house. They will do just "awful" things to your PC! :lol:

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You ought to limit this to big budget, mainstream films. There are some stinkers.

 

 

Hey, you guys develop the thread as you wish, I'm only the instigator of this puppy.

 

If it stinks, think!! :smiley30:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And here's an obvious one, well actually, several hundred.

 

All the films that Sy Fy channel puts out, with their own production companies. Short of a few, pure pap! Written in a total "Dumbed-Down for Dummies" style, insipid plots, terrible CG animation, ridiculous scripts and actor's lines, STINKY!:smiley30: Yes this li'l piggy will be the official seal of a "pure stinky productions"! An insult to pigs everywhere, but it's apt for this li'l adventure in bad film.

 

:smiley30: :smiley30: will mean, super-stinky!

 

:smiley30: :smiley30: :smiley30: will mean, beyond Stinky! That's as high as we can get, or you'll hit the "Too many Smileys" quota thingie.

 

I watched several over the years, Heaven help us, a 5 year old could make a more interesting film.

 

That doesn't include some very good production stuff like "Battle Star Galactica", the film versions, but there's a lot of pure "stupid", in their weekly offerings.

 

You can disagree, no problem, but I stand behind their mountain of garbage films.

Edited by papasmurf
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Relic from 1997 had to have been one of the absolute WORST book adaptations ever made. The book was phenomenal, and it's one I re-read from time to time. How the authors let his piece of garbage past them I'll never know, but they should be ashamed. The movie left out the the major character, and the only relationship to the book was a few names. Truly, truly horrible.

 

The 2005 remake of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy would be on my list, too, as would Battlefield Earth.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Relic from 1997 had to have been one of the absolute WORST book adaptations ever made. The book was phenomenal, and it's one I re-read from time to time. How the authors let his piece of garbage past them I'll never know, but they should be ashamed. The movie left out the the major character, and the only relationship to the book was a few names. Truly, truly horrible.

 

The 2005 remake of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy would be on my list, too, as would Battlefield Earth.

 

 

Oh gooood ones!!! I totally hear you on the Relic, captivating book, Super-Stinky!:smiley30: :smiley30: ...oink....oink.....sueeeeee........

The Hitchikers Guide was pitiful as well, the original show, a Brit production was campy, low budget, but I actually enjoyed it. The animations were frequent, and it was a very fun ride.

I'll give that one a definite "Stinky" vote!:smiley30: ...oink...

 

 

OMG! A rival to "Plan 9...".... "Battlefield Earth"...jeezus, even Travolta admitted it was "Junk".:smiley30: :smiley30: :smiley30: Supremely Stinky!!

 

I'm truly ashamed that I didn't think of it myself!

 

But I do have one, since you dragged me to these depths of cinematic disgrace. Yuck, what's that on the floor....?

 

"The Green Slime" , a 60's flick, Japanese production, American lead actors. OK, at the Drive in when I was a kid, it's was pretty funny. But if you dare watch it now, the giggles will explode your lips right off. I kid you not.

 

Yvette Mimieux was in that, she was popular in the 60's as an Actress. French actresses were the vogue then, think "Catherine Deneuve", she had a lot of hit flicks by that time.

 

Anyways, this flick, done about the time "Star Trek" first came out, was so Stinky, it was almost good,......for laughs!!

 

Trek had some serious production quality for it's time. CBS, the first to be approached to air the series, said it was "Too good for TV".

 

So a good film, using the available technology of that time, could have been done.

Not in this case.....the whole thing is on "Pee Wees Playhouse" level. You can even see the strings moving Rockets, and Monsters, badly.

 

I can't think of a solitary good effect, actor, or image in that entire film. Supremely Stinky!! :smiley30: :smiley30: :smiley30:

 

However, I would have loved to see what MST3K, would have done with it!

Edited by papasmurf
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Excluding the junk made specifially for SyFy, a couple of real movie movies that I saw in the theaters as a teenager that stunk are:

 

Battle Beyond the Stars, starring John-boy Walton (I had to look these titles up) and a young Molly Ringwald in Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone.

 

Both movies were awful and tried to capitalize on the Star Wars craze.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The most offensive one that I have seen was GALAXY OF TERROR!!!! Stupid and no plot that made sense.

 

 

I saw that one, truly magnificent, in it's true awfulness....:smiley30: :smiley30:

 

A real Roger Corman stinker...Edward Albert, Erin Moran, lots of people in a bad film.

 

Good one Dude!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Excluding the junk made specifially for SyFy, a couple of real movie movies that I saw in the theaters as a teenager that stunk are:

 

Battle Beyond the Stars, starring John-boy Walton (I had to look these titles up) and a young Molly Ringwald in Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone.

 

Both movies were awful and tried to capitalize on the Star Wars craze.

 

 

Oh you got that right! Right after Star Wars, all sorts of "copykat" films came out from every film studio on the planet. Bad, Japanese, Swedish, German, Chinese, and it goes on and on......

 

Dull story line, fake effects, baaaad acting! Wasn't Man From U.N.C.L.E, Mr. Vaughn in "Battle Beyond the Stars"? It's a stinker, 2 piggies for that bit of nonsense :smiley30: :smiley30:

 

"Spacehunter", yep, superior Stinkyness there, Molly, go away.....:smiley30: :smiley30:

 

Both earn 2 Piggies!!

 

C'mon, this is getting interesting, unload man, be cleansed of those ol' bad film blues....:smiley31:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think that was the worse part....well known stars all in a Cr&ppy movie. (Sorry Dennis, can't think of a cival word to use to describe it)!

Edited by Mark Aldrich
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here are a few more for your consideration...

 

Zardoz (why, Sean? why?!?)

 

Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter (worth it for Caroline Munro, however)

 

Starcrash (ditto again for Miss Munro, though)

 

Steel (this was one of Shaquille O'Neal's first starring forays as an "actor")

 

The recent remake of the Time Machine (Samantha Mumba was no Weena)

 

Simon - good point on Yvette Mimieux - here's an idea for a new thread - actors/acrtresses that appeared in among the worst sci-fi films of all time as well as an all time classic...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here are a few more for your consideration...

 

Zardoz (why, Sean? why?!?)

 

Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter (worth it for Caroline Munro, however)

 

Starcrash (ditto again for Miss Munro, though)

 

Steel (this was one of Shaquille O'Neal's first starring forays as an "actor")

 

The recent remake of the Time Machine (Samantha Mumba was no Weena)

 

Simon - good point on Yvette Mimieux - here's an idea for a new thread - actors/acrtresses that appeared in among the worst sci-fi films of all time as well as an all time classic...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Zardoz!! Stinky, and....oh yes, Stinky!!:smiley30: Indeed, Sean regretted doing that, he said it years later, after the success of the 007 films. Terrible acting, and a plot that that was a bit too subtle to make sense.

 

Yep, Miss Munro is yummy, but those films are definite "Oinkers"! :smiley30:

 

"Steel", Shaq, stay on the court, and off our screens, beyond stinky!!:smiley30: :smiley30:

 

Remake of the "Time Machine", not great I admit, but some of it was interesting, as it updated some of that "Victorian Technology". I thought Jeremy Iron's performance was interesting as well, as the head "Morlock", he gave it a very sinister touch. However, the rest of the film is "so-so" by any standards. I'd give it one piggy.:smiley30:

 

On worst films with known actress's in them, first thought, "Barbarella". Jane Fonda became a mega star, but in her careers infancy, Gore Vidal made her do this idiotic film. Although she was pure "eye candy", no question there, the film was extremely stinky!! Dumb, dumb, dumb. As kitsch as the shag carpet in her space ship. Two piggies for that Stinker! :smiley30: :smiley30:

 

Nearing, or met, my smiley quota by now. jeeez that's dumb. Sorry, just my opinion. I know about bandwith limitations, resource demands of images and GIF files. Just upgrade you server or IPS limits. And no, I don't pay your internet bills, but it does limit the "Fun Quota" on the site. Just a thought....

 

Another, Dorothy Stratten, in "Galaxina", jeeeeez, so DUMB! Not a great actress, and died under very tragic circumstances, but as a Playboy Playmate, she did not belong on the screen. Superbly Stinky! :smiley30: :smiley30:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think the worst movie I've ever paid to see was Lifeforce. Even Mathilda May couldn't save this one.

 

Don

 

 

Yep, she was a hottie! This film is a Stinker! Steve Railsback should stick to "Psychotic" characters, not Astronauts.

 

Even Patrick "Picard" Stewart, is in this thing! His head explodes or something...yuck...

 

Vampires from Space, mayhem in the streets, it's a mess!

 

Two piggies for this waste of video....:smiley30: :smiley30:

 

 

By the way Smurflings, it's an open discussion. You too have the power to assign "Piggies"!!!:smiley30:

 

Yes, you, you there, use them piggies, they are waiting there for you!! Just on the right of the page, see them?

 

I'm bustin' my Smurf butt building this HUGE Enterprise E model, can't rate every movie you guys come up with, help me out!!:wacko:

 

This thread is coming along nicely, so go nuts!!!:smiley2: (Within acceptable IPMS guidelines, keep it clean people)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have to get into this with some nominations.

 

Let's start with SLIPSTREAM. It featured Mark Hamill (post-Star Wars trilogy in 1989), Bill Paxton, and Ben Kingsley.

 

Here are some you may never have heard of: FROZEN ALIVE (1964), THE DAY TIME ENDED (1980), A JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF TIME (1967), UNKNOWN WORLD (1951), and IN THE YEAR 2889 (1966). All are awful and barely watchable.

 

These six bombs are packaged with three others on DVD that we all know: THINGS TO COME (1936), METROPOLIS (1927), and THE LOST WORLD (1925). These three were first-rate in their time.

 

Ed

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have to get into this with some nominations.

 

Let's start with SLIPSTREAM. It featured Mark Hamill (post-Star Wars trilogy in 1989), Bill Paxton, and Ben Kingsley.

 

Here are some you may never have heard of: FROZEN ALIVE (1964), THE DAY TIME ENDED (1980), A JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF TIME (1967), UNKNOWN WORLD (1951), and IN THE YEAR 2889 (1966). All are awful and barely watchable.

 

These six bombs are packaged with three others on DVD that we all know: THINGS TO COME (1936), METROPOLIS (1927), and THE LOST WORLD (1925). These three were first-rate in their time.

 

Ed

 

 

Yep, they packaged 3 classics, with a bunch of Stinkers!! No doubt because they have zillions of copies of the stinkers, on shelves in the warehouse.

 

I give the stinkers 2 piggies each, at the very least...:smiley30: :smiley30:

 

"Slipstream" shows why Mark Hamill never got past his "Star Wars" fame, he never did anything worthwhile afterwards. Shame...

 

it's dumb, very very dumb. I'd give that particular one two piggies and a tad of vomit....:smiley30: :smiley30: :smiley11:

Edited by papasmurf
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here's a classic stinker... "What Waits Below". From the early 80's.

 

 

Nice one Mike! A really stinky Stinker!! Submarines, Albino Cave dwellers who hate noise and wear bad wigs. Tim Bottoms is in this thing, along with "Wolfie Wolfstein Rob Powell".

 

So dumb, it may cause permanent brain damage. Bad props, lousy effects, and horrendous and vile acting, true "Stinkorama".

 

This one earns the coveted three piggies, and a star award, for "Ultimate Stinky"! :smiley30: :smiley30: :smiley30::smiley10:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

There was a B&W film made back iin the 50's named 'Devil Girl From Mars'.

Truly awful............Truly Forgettable.

As bad as Plan 9 From Outer Space.

 

I can remember one episode of the original Star Trek series as being disappointing as it had an alien species in what looked like a fish tank (probably was) and you could see the puppet strings! I know this was before CGI but stop go animation like Ray Harryhausen's could have been used to better effect. I expect it was time and budget restraints that would not allow for this.

 

Incidentally. Thanks for the compliment Papa Smurf. I was blissfully unaware that I had sowed the seed to start this thread off! Good fun reading and posting about all the trash movies we have been subjected to over the years!

Edited by noelsmith
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Rusty,

 

I think you are thinking of that fine feature film that was unjustly overlooked by the Academy at Oscar time, "Santa Claus CONQUERS the Martians"

 

It was MUCH better after MST3K did it! :P

 

Rusty,

 

That is true of nearly every film MST3K took a shot at.

 

BTW, I would nominate any of the Star Wars prequels. Awful big-budget film making.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...